Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Funny Drinking Facts


How far can you go????

1. Sober
Sober, Adj. Possessed of iron will, but often lacking a sense of humor. Helpful with doing dishes, finding cd's and lifts home. Probably in need of several stiff drinks!

2. Tipsy
Tipsy, Adj. The usual signs are a flushed face, stupid grin, loud voice and a profound love for mankind. The sufferer is incredibly deep, inelligent and insightful but prone to giggle.

3. Plastered
Plastered, adj. Extremely generous, loud and confident. Suffering from verbal diarrhea and a belief that he/she can drink anyone under the table.

4. Drunk
Drunk, Adj. Suffering from vision, hearing and speech impairment, with an insatiable appetite for pizza. Will do anything that moves. Possessing an illogical belief that he/she is gorgeous despite dribbling and slobbering.

5. Shit-faced
Shit-faced, Adj. Invincible but incapable. Suffering from extreme loss of balance, co-ordination and sex appeal. Liable to sleep anywhere. Babbling incoherently with loss of most bodily functions.

6. Hung-over
Hung-over, Adj. Suffering from near death like state, often catatonic and always with a pounding headache. Unbalanced with no sense of humor. Needs total silence and another drink!

5 comments:

arati kadav said...

Good ones - so what are you generally - lemme guess - "Drunk"

Alistair D'souza said...

well when I blog I suffer from verbal diarrhoea and the other traits.. so you could say I'm 'Tipsy' and 'Plastered' in the third dimension...

'Drunk'... well I do have a permanent vision impairment... and have an insatiable appetite for food. And will do anything that moves. And I do possess an illogical belief that I am gorgeous despite dribbling and slobbering. OH MY GAAWD!!!!! I'm a perpetual 'drunk'... shucks I need to cover it up with a few pegs... hick... hick...

Ree said...

My guess...hung over...innit innit???

Alistair D'souza said...

well I've tried... tried again when I went to goa over the past weekend... didn't even reach tipsy... sob sob....

anyways am hung-over with the wonderful goa experience never the less...

emanish said...

and you are the only one to be blamed for that (not getting drunk in GOA).

I have been hung-over a couple of times. . i think another name for it is nirvana !