Sunday, May 27, 2007

Howto curb the Middle Finger version 2 dot Oh my gawd

Slang has it that the middle finger is shown to people to express contempt for by or as by the obscene gesture of pointing the middle finger upward while folding the other fingers against the palm.

Ever thought of ways to restrain people from flashing their middle finger.

Version 1 dot Oh no it won't work.
Wish that they were born with six fingers instead of five and then they wouldn't have a middle finger. Naah that won't work in most cases.

Version 2 dot Oh my gawd (will work on men only)
1) Catch unsuspecting man in the mall. He may be moving around with some other girls who are
busy shopping cause a sale is on.

2) Ask him, "Could I show you something". To which he would reply out of courtesy, "Err ok", Courtesy and just to kill time.

3) Take his hand and ask him his name and then tell him, "Can I call you Alice". To which he starts to try and calculate the probability of that happening. He is pretty much amused and says, "Sure".

4) Say, "So Alice have you noticed how rough the top of the finger tips are. I can make it smooth". He is still trying to calculate the probability of some unknown person calling him Alice and doesn't know what he says yes to.

5) Remove some tools and brush his middle finger and then put some liquid on it and then wipe it. All the while keep him distracted with questions about how many sisters he has and if he has a girlfriend to which he tries to give a diplomatic worldly accepted answer, "Errrrrrr hmmmm".

6) Finally ask him how it looks to which he replies, "Its shining. Could you take off the liquid and get it back to its original look. I can actually see my reflection in it".

7) To which you reply, "Err well it will be smooth and shiny for a couple of days". To which he replies in horror, "Oh my gawd".

8) He is too ashamed to show anyone his middle finger.

9) Somehow the girls who he was with see it and go 'Oh my Gawd" and laugh and wonder what he did. Which makes him keep the middle finger under wraps and not flash it to anyone.


Reema Banerjee said...

I am SOOO tempted to try this but shucks...this city has ppl who get a panic attack if they notice somebody looking at them for more than a minute u know...terrorists! they well...any more ideas?

Etchen said...

This sounds like a perfect idea!
In college aguy friend of mine has his nails painted while he was asleep--it took him over a week to keep chipping off the paint. He never had sisters and so he didn't know...and we weren't going to tell him that there was this wonderful thing called nail polish remover. polish on a man is a damned funny sight to see. ;-)

Alistair D'souza said...

@ reema
ppl look at each other for different reasons...
well if ppl stare at me then I stare back... and try to slip in a smile in between (after an analysis of the situation) :-) if they don't return the gesture its not a big deal anyways...

@ etchen
I wanted to click a snap and save the shiny middle finger for eternity but then I decided otherwise :-) it was just too shiny and looked weird/odd on my hand...